Knowing..

A very depressing day is what i had today. The sky was gloomy, no light and it did even drizzle in the evening. It was cold everywhere, i could no longer sit in my room with my ceiling fan on. Everywhere, in my house i could see dreary darkness and was very quiet, except for the small crackers in the road that alarmed me. I wondered, people wanted to fire crackers in this weather? I was annoyed. I had two more souls in the house, but they were busy in their room quietly.
It became dark very early, and i went outside to my balcony. After a long time i watched the starry night. It was beautiful, i believe its one of the most beautiful sights from the world. I could see the constellation Orion and this particular set of stars were always seen from my balcony,like it never leaves me. They were more constellations, but i could not figure out,what they were. I thought about my childhood, where i loved studying about space and planets and how, i use to tell my parents that i wanted to be an astronaut when i grew up. It was just a childhood dream. I remember hearing and reading about these stars,that most of the stars we see might have blew up or disappeared after emitting light. So since the stars are light years away, we would not know for that many light years, after that moment. Interesting.
I even thought about the movie Knowing which i saw recently. I enjoyed the science-fiction which was frightening, suspenseful, and entertaining. Lot of moments that can drift your imagination, can make you think and may be even know how the life in this world could change. The best part is where your left to think, if another world exists or not. Watching the sky, i did think about it. Well, i would never say no. Because i believe an average life span of a human being 70-75, be it more or less, is not wide enough to know this whole world. There is always a possibility that we would not know about many things around us. So when you don’t have the complete knowledge how can anyone say that something does not exist? It might, you never know.
Yes, to know anything we should not be ignorant. I see things, i think about it and i try to know it better. They say the devil works well in your mind,when your idle. But i take my idle time to think about various things in the simplest way. A walk in the beach, travel in a car, lazing around at home, i just keep thinking, and i try to know the many things my way. My mind keeps talking to me, than i use my tongue. That’s how i am locked up in my thoughts most of the time. Nothing great,but all i can say is its just me :-)

Hello everyone..

 Today is my birthday. With very little outlook and thought about this special day,is how i started it..
As i mentioned about my flight in the previous post, i was really not too keen in spending the special time at work. But i just chose to do it.
I always separated work and pleasure. However, things were a little different at work.
There were people who knew about my birthday. They wished me and rendered their love. It was
very touchy, but at the same time i could see people walk around green-eyed. Its the nauseating work
culture, i must say.

But sitting here right now, i find myself very satisfied and happy with this day. My loved ones were not around,
my work did not favor with time, but i still think it was a simple and great day ..
Yes i had surprises, which i never expected, there were gifts for me and with a little effort everyone
brightened moments for me in their way, and it was just not me alone..
 The best part is few special people reached me and they was with me in the way they could.
I never had a feeling to go out,grab all the fun or party hard.
It was just sweet and simple.
Thanks to one and all!!

My not so special silver jubilee to come.

I got a call from office were they gave me my schedule for tomorrow. I have a Singapore flight tomorrow night with departure 01:30 and guess what my birthday is on 22nd. That night im flying, im working.

Well i felt bad, but now that i have started to think, why i should feel bad.

I dont have many who would call me or throw party for me. But some did ask me to travel to there city for celebration. But work again. May be i can expect few wishes or messages on phone. But no regrets,because im not a person who is very loyal in calling and wishing my friends when they have there special day. Thats bad,i know. Well, basically i just don't have any plans.

My sister is also travelling home today and im going to be alone. So my only option is stop cribbing ,go for work and make some moolah.

 So dolefully, i surfed to find how i can spend the day of my birthday alone. And there are pretty good options you can choose. Like one of the options mentioned was to go out of town. But my leaves are already taken. Another option says ,buy a gift for myself,which is good and different. I might go for a walk in the evening, strolling the unknown streets and i will dine alone where i get some good food with a drink. Sounds good.

But as of now, i have many hours left with me for the clock to tick and for the day.
I would conclude it like this..
Don't dwell on the reason why you're alone. Life is full of changes and twists and just because you're alone now it's not a reflection of who you are.

Advance Happy birthday to me.. Cheers!

My imprudent thoughts

I flew to Kuala lumpur yesterday night and im back home surfing the net. I can feel my head as heavy as lead. It wasn't a tiring flight but i guess, my work in the pressurized cabin and my eyes that has striven to stay open was another reason. But my fingers are ready to write..

My flight had a delay of about 1 hour and while i was preparing my work one by one, my eyes started running through the menu cards which was prepared for the guests. The theme on the cards were Mosaic lights. Its from Turkey,Greece. It was a small description about it ,but i was very interested to know more about it.After getting back home i searched about it. I found that there were lanterns,lamp shades and candle holders made out of glass mosaic. I very well remember seeing them ,but never felt i would like it or i would jot down about it. All of it looked exceptionally brilliant. It transcends to lot of expressions which is untold..

May be while i gave the visual examination, the lights won over me. I badly want to purchase one and i wish i could do that from one of the Turkish bazaars.

 So as of now, i don't want to make this one of my imprudent thoughts. Im going to lock this interest inside me. On that note, i cant wait to discover the muted tones as expressed between the shadow and light through the language of mosaics.

 After a very long gap from the last post i published,im back again. I was first reading my previous blogs again and again and thought, i was good in writing or may be its just fine. But everything turned topsy turvy when i showed my blog, to one of my good friend and she laughed at it ,and i was chagrined. 

However, im not going to give up. Im still going to write and hope someday someone would read me.
I like writing about myself,about what i do and how things turns good or bad for me.
So here i start.

Its been like a life in hot furnace, but a furnace that would not kill u . Yes, thats how its been for me for
the past 2-3years. Oh.. i guess thats not a good start.
How about i write on, why i got back with blogging? Yes, its a movie. And i must say im really influenced by movies. Being a very emotional and romantic person, i tend to get carried away with stories that touch me. I think sometimes i was the character or may be i had a life that ways. Strange isnt it?

Coming to the point the movie is Julie & Julia. Im really in love with the character Julia Child played by Meryl streep. A very innocent lady who ends up writing many great recipes and how food or cooking got her life back into the track. It was just amazing. The other character Julie Powell is almost like me. She was determined but confused, nervous, troubled her love and thought the world fell apart, everytime something went wrong. But i was pleased to see the characters immense love and admiration to cooking. For me, im a big foodie! I love to eat or may be i live to eat.

One of my favourite movie quotes means this way. " I dont like people living with 1/4th teaspoon of olive oil in the meal or having food with substitutes." Its like this.. "You and I, we know the secret of life, its butter"

So thats for now.. me telling all of you my love towards food and my share of thoughts and why im here
writing to you.

Bon appetit!

I have been leading a life with no head and tail. Lazy and dis organised as my mom say, but for me its just that i'm trying to figure out where i started and where i'm going to end. So my journey of thought start from the time i think about me, sitting in my car with my friend going to school for my 12th exam. We had a white paper stuck on the front of my car, which read in block letters 'EXAM URGENT'. No sense but ,yes we had bandh in Kerala.

I had my physics exam. I had my physics text book,which i opened for the first and last look. I realised all i read, was what i heard in class from my teacher and my text books and notes are just for sake. I saw my friend sitting next to me busy going through the pages in hurry.

I kept my cool as always and soon exams were over. I'm a very bad actor , but the only time i try attempting that talent is when my results approach. Results came and i had first class when my mom had a big sigh of relief(smiles). I had many people in my family asking me why a first class only? I smiled at them. I had all reasons to feel low when they attended me with ignominy,but i happily ignored them. Well yes i never worked hard or sat down with my books. If i did that i could have scored much more. All i did was thanked god and my little brain for giving me more than my efforts.

Then came the college days. Once you see the hue and cry the parents and students make, for getting into engineering and medicine, you would actually think there's no one better than a doctor and engineer by profession. Neither i was interested in it nor i wanted to be a part of the crowd. I kept thinking what i would excel in my life. Once again parents choice falls in place for me and i proceed to Cochin for my degree in business administration. To my surprise,i really did good, among the commerce students specially for mathematics,which i usually hate. I did great in all subjects except accounting, eventhough i liked my sir. That was dissapointing for me as i could not impress him, ahemm... As usual im very active in all extra curricular activities happening and my small popularity and fondness among seniors and classmates, encouraged me to stand up for elections in my college which was coming up after few months. Was pretty exciting.

But as days passed by, my question of what next for me ,kept ticking. I'm doing good here,but i kept thinking whether this was my field for my future. Studies and management books started to bore me and made no sense. I wanted to start working. Being a libran, i knew i was creative and thought of fields and courses from that point.

Mom was definitely against ,but yes i was not happy with what she opted for me either.

I closed my ears to do what i wanted to,and to earn it. My dream of flying was what i earned out of it. I got selected for Cabin Crew from Cochin for Jet Airways among thousands of people who attended the interview.

I took my first flight to Mumbai to live my dream and i recieved commendation of doing what i wanted from my mom and friends. All happened in a months time and i put myself as one among the blessed.

Yes its the same feeling of me thinking that i'm blessed by god , is why i lead a simple life now.

No doubt, i definitely have my part of fun, but i would not take my blessings for granted.

Well now i have reached here,excelling in my work and awaiting my next promotion, i still think what brought me here and what would happen with me tomorrow. That does give me a murky thought on my life.. but the truth is there's much more left...

Incredible autumn

 
Its the second day of my rest after my flights to Brussels and Toronto. It was not really a great flight. I had bunch full of issues on few days,and if there wasn’t issue, then i had to feel the chill in the air between me and my senior. Very unprofessional situation though.
But living in my own moments most of the time, the only thing i enjoyed watching and feeling in my trip was the fallen leaves. It’s the fall of autumn and starting of winter. The trees were all dry and seemed sad to lose its leaves. They were looking beautiful with red,orange and golden leaves flying all over and few yet to fall. I completely enjoyed a walk alone,in Toronto when the leaves were the only ones to walk with me or ,may be they flew in my path. Not a long walk but i enjoyed the moderate weather in Toronto than Brussels ,which was extremely cold and windy, and something i can hardly bear.

I felt bad to see few trees with no leaves, all shed completely. I wished it had its parts just like that even in winter also. The branches without leaves seemed to me like a person who is dilapidated. That feeling is terrible ,and i wish to see all the trees right after winter fully bloomed. I want to see them all with small green leaves sprouting from trees. Its such a refreshing sight.
Moreover, i could see the parts of city from above while my flight took off. The whole city looked like golden mushrooms sprouted in between the buildings.
The joy of seeing and feeling nature in your way is a very special.  You can be a nature lover and pronounce the feeling distinctively.
Yes, im a true ardent lover of nature. I love everything from trees,lands,rivers and lakes. I think its the creation that i enjoy myself every time. What about you?